job

So does that make Ashley a... funereal estate agent? - Matty Malaprop

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DON'T CALL THAT NUMBER MAN HE HAS A COMBOVER AND YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHERE THAT COMBOVER HAS BEEN!!!!!! - Matty Malaprop

Hey Joe, I said where you goin' with that pen in your hand? - Matty Malaprop

It doesn't hurt that he's basically the big cheese around his office, either. - Matty Malaprop

Sadly, this isn't the first time he sat his pants during an important interview... - Matty Malaprop

He spent a good decade working in the banking industry, but a motion within his company to start charging farmers fees for their annual harvests was the last straw.

Given my history with Ikea product assembly, I'm mostly positive I'll never net this gig... - Matty Malaprop