insult

Fortunately (unfortunately?), man's best friend is more or less man's worst drug. Unless you're a crazy dog person, but that's just silly. - Matty Malaprop

Love LOLcats? Who doesn't?! There are so many more over here!

Ugh, Square can be such an ass sometimes. His hurtful words are meant in jest, but they still have apostrophic consequences on sensitive souls like Circle. - Matty Malaprop

Black bear just got burned so hard, he's going to need a winter's worth of hibernation for his creys. - Matty Malaprop

Beneath his cruel exterior, he's really just too chicken to even try to make friends. - Matty Malaprop

If you're the kind of person who gets squeamish over literary violence, you'd best keep scrolling. - Matty Malaprop

Boasting makes you do so.

That a piss-off is synonymously known as a sword fight lends the word rapier a whole bunch of different awkward connotations. Ew. - Matty Malaprop