freddie mercury

After a day at the races, there's nothing more satisfying than an afternoon spent tidying up around the house. That's not actually a true statement at all, but I couldn't figure out how else to fit a Queen pun into this write-up. - Matty Malaprop

When "Don't Stop Me Now" becomes "Can't Stop Me Now." - Matty Malaprop

Turns out it was there all along; we just needed to let Mercury ride its bicycle first in order to work up a sweat! - Matty Malaprop

Well that wasn't so difficult, now was it? - Matty Malaprop

It's my birthday tomorrow, boys and girls. Buy me this shirt as a prezzie plz? - Matty Malaprop

I'mma just say it: The Lion King would have been a million times better if Queen had done the soundtrack instead of Elton John. - Matty Malaprop

Impressive. But can you draw a little silhouette of a man? - Matty Malaprop

Sailor Freddie Mercury, everyone's favorite Sailor Scout.

Caution: Contents are under pressure. - Matty Malaprop

Class is in session at the School of Fail!

Hyenas and elephant bones, very very darkly toned for me! - Matty Malaprop