Orange soda-flavored lipgloss does sound quite delicious, to be fair... - Matty Malaprop
Orange soda-flavored lipgloss does sound quite delicious, to be fair... - Matty Malaprop
My love life is like the gondola scene from Lady and the Tramp, but with more icebergs and horrible death. - Matty Malaprop
Ever since he made that last Rambo movie, his friend and relationship prospects have all become a little Rocky. - Matty Malaprop
If you're going to be forever alone, at least your bath bubbles can keep you company this way! - Matty Malaprop
Ferris wheel? More like unfairest wheel, amirite? - Matty Malaprop