duck

... and any other household mallardies there might be in your apartment. - Matty Malaprop

♪ Guess the pitch of my quackin' wasn't enough / to make you moo-ove or waddle thro-ough / I said if I was a mallard, I'd still be standin' / in this anatidae line (anatidae line) / but for now I'll waddle all around and you can't pull me out of my duck queue. ♪ - Matty Malaprop

Q: What do you call an entrée of imitation duck meat? A: A Pâté de Fraud Gras. - Matty Malaprop

I mean, it's maybe the only thing that even approaches the amazingness of the table flip.

(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻ - doɹdɐlɐɯ ʎʇʇɐɯ

Me gusta more than the other version. Me gusta much much more. - Matty Malaprop

Funny, you don't look like a Charmander to me... - Matty Malaprop

Oh mallard! Things are getting really real up in this house right now. - Matty Malaprop

CURSE YOU HOMOPHONES! WHY MUST YOU WREAK HAVOC ON MY FOOD-WORD ASSOCIATIONS? - Matty Malaprop