crime

As someone who's most certainly on punmaster death row, I too fear for my life thanks to the severity of our society's punitive system. - Matty Malaprop

Punmaster Ken says: "CSI? NCIS? Law & Order: SVU? They don't have anything on L.C.S.D. - Literal Crime Scene Detectives."

After watching this footage, I'm fairly certain these detectives planted the evidence on their suspect. It's just a hunch I have, what with all the potting soil on the ground... - Matty Malaprop

I asked him to STOP, but he refused to even YIELD his kleptomaniacal deeds! - Matty Malaprop

A simple space makes a world of difference. - Matty Malaprop

Man, these burglars were swinging low when they decided to break in and steal some stuff from Conan O'Brien's set. 

Turns out jury-rigging a stereo into an explosive is really just a matter of knowing how to blow a fuse. - Matty Malaprop