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The last time iWas in court, it was because iFailed to weasel my way out of jury duty. Wamp wamp. - Matty Malaprop

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By Shelley (Via *C*FP)
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At least it's unmistakably an apple computer. - Matty Malaprop

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By tonis
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They keep him (?) employed because he's the best salesperson in the whole galaxy. - Matty Malaprop

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After all, he was the former CEO's main squeeze. #ApplesAreTotallyOrangesNow #Didn'tYouGetTheMemo? - Matty Malaprop

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If that's the case, then I have doubts about how safe it is to drive such a vehicle... - Matty Malaprop

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Drinking it is a great way to help your body defend against the dark arts! - Matty Malaprop