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Usage of the semi-colon in text messages

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Hope I Can Remember the Password

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Not Pictured: Getting Grossed Out By the Spit Suction

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You're Not Going to Try and Talk to Me About the Book of Mormon, Are You?

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Every. Damn. Time

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It's Really More of a Chortle

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Scumbag Safari Competes With IE

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That All Depends on How You Do Your Grocery Shopping

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Ten More Minutes, Mom

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It's Like Doing Squats

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When the lights start to flicker

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People who tell me to sit down

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Laws Broken by Wile E. Coyote

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Why I Hate School

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