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Things people do with joke-a-day calendars

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Employee finds out their company is hiring their exact position at $18k higher than their current salary: 'We can't adjust everyones salary every time we post a new position'

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Employer calls employee's emergency contact to ask if he can come into work: 'Employer just called my mom to ask if I'd come in, because I didn't answer. I'm 30 years old.'

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