It's his favorite publication; he's been collecting every issue since the day it was first printed! - Matty Malaprop

Death, or deathly punmanship. There's no winning when those are your options. - Matty Malaprop

Not even a crafty shoop could convincingly merge Wongs into Wrights, I don't think. - Matty Malaprop

I imagine this particular artist did not score very high trademarks in his circle-drawing seminar... - Matty Malaprop

I suppose if you're an exhibitionist then this sort of thing gets you about as Pumped up as Steven Tyler always is. - Matty Malaprop

Though I suppose soccer with two balls would be a rather fascinating game to watch... - Matty Malaprop

BAD JOKE EEL, WHY YOU NOT AS FUNNY AS YOUR MAMMALIAN COUNTERPART? - Matty Malaprop