Some puns are worth waiting a lifetime for. - Matty Malaprop

Set humor to ludicrous speed!

The pun doesn't come in until about the 1:30 mark, but the lead-up is what makes it all worth it if you ask me. - Matty Malaprop

I've always been quite partial to puns with this much linearity. - Matty Malaprop

That's pretty harsh, man. Maybe you should give him at least a little bit of Italyway before you go and unfriend him like that. - Matty Malaprop

In a tragic twist, the monks were found dead in their monastery a few days later. The crime scene was a massacre, and a very somber coroner was forced to ask a question no one ever wants to hear: "Officer, whose spine is this, anyway?" - Matty Malaprop

Strong, mighty, relentless, majestic, glistening and blue.

... oh, you were talking about the falls? I was talking about my ding-dong. Sorry. - Matty Malaprop

If you're gonna go out to lunch, you really oughta go out to lunch, namsayin? - Matty Malaprop