This has long been my personal life rule... and look how I've turned out! #MaybeYouShouldn'tLiveThisWay #ButComeOnYouKnowYouWantTo - Matty Malaprop

... it's sh*t like this that makes me simultaneously love and loathe everyone in the current generation. - Matty Malaprop

Only a total fruit would give into pear pressure, 'namsayin? #I'mNotHomophobicISwear #THISPUNISABOUTFRUIT #NOITREALLYACTUALLYIS - Matty Malaprop

I mean, given their linguistically failed name, I suppose such punishable typos should be expected in such a place. - Matty Malaprop

LOL J/K IT ACTUALLY COSTS YOU $25 EXTRA PLUS ALL APPLICABLE STATE TAXES LOLOLOLOL SUCKS 3 B U. - Matty Malaprop

... what does fabluous mean? No really. I'm curious. - Matty Malaprop