The Only Direction I Want to Send Them is Downward

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The Only Direction I Want to Send Them is Downward
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To hell. Because Satan's post-coital joy-screech still sounds roughly a million times better than they do. - Matty Malaprop

It's a Hole in One!

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It's a Hole in One!
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... as opposed to a "whole in one," because the idea of phenomenological tautology is probably well beyond the purview of this site. - Matty Malaprop

Give Me Beans, Give Me Tacos, Give Me Gringos, Give Me Paco!

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Give Me Beans, Give Me Tacos, Give Me Gringos, Give Me Paco!
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Mariachica are gonna be the biggest band since The Beatles, I'm telling ya! - Matty Malaprop

Thuggin' Like a C-3PO

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Thuggin' Like a C-3PO
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When faced with his impending death while locked in combat against Darth Vader, Obie-Trice Kenobi parted from his mortal frame by simply saying Cheers.

Happy Star Wars Day! Honor the Jedi within by checking out our Star Wars-themed Cheezburger site!

The Oldest Ick in the Book

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The Oldest Ick in the Book
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Oh, so we're calling it a sport now, are we? News to me... - Matty Malaprop

One Keet - Parakeet

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One Keet - Parakeet
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This pun could stand to be more thorough, if you ask me. Whenever I make jokes about bird, I make sure my punchlines are backed up in triplikeet. - Matty Malaprop