Can we please just go back to mono-fart jokes as the de fact form of lowbrow entertainment? Please??? - Matty Malaprop

... that makes one of us, anonymous submitter. Because I certainly do not. - Matty Malaprop

I don't think I wood ever be able to forgive the kind of person who would do this in my apartment's bathroom. - Matty Malaprop

I wouldn't wear these shoes if I was paid to do so and they were hand-Taylored for me and me alone. - Matty Malaprop

Want more fashion fails? We've got you covered... at least partially, that is.

To hell. Because Satan's post-coital joy-screech still sounds roughly a million times better than they do. - Matty Malaprop

I just want you all to know that this is only on the front page because YOU all said you liked it. I wash my hands of this whole sappy quotidian matter! - Matty Malaprop