You had that appointment booked for months! I'm glad it went well for you! - Matty Malaprop

Every boy I meet in real life just doesn't seem to be on the same page as me. - Matty Malaprop

It may not be the best way to read, but it's certainly the Hemingway to read! - Matty Malaprop

You may be a nigh-unreadable tome of mutilated language, but you deserve fairer treatment than this! - Matty Malaprop

I mean, I end up buried under a pile of books at least three times a week since I tend to run into my bookcase while trying to put on pants on a hyper-regular basis. - Matty Malaprop