This is truly the work of a bergeoning punsmith. - Matty Malaprop
Not even gonna lie, I spent roughly the latter 2/3 of the movie waiting for everyone to just UP AND DIE ALREADY. - Matty Malaprop
Lettuce not panic. We are not green sailors. If we keep our heads straight, I'm sure we can make it out of this alive. - Matty Malaprop
I'm king of the... beets? - Matty Malaprop
I say that not pejoratively, but merely because Thai food is always my favorite thing ever forever. - Matty Malaprop
This 5-Year-Old Made the Cutest AND Most Heroic 911 Call at the Same Time
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Stupid Crime of the Day: Carjackers Likely to Die After Radioactive Exposure
Remember That Time Paul Walker Gave a Military Couple the Best Engagement Ever?
One of the Most Unsatisfying GIFs of All Time
We Believe in You, Mr. Noodle!
Pokémon Types by State
The "Special" in Special Ed
Aziz Ansari Captures Why it Sucks to be Single Today
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