I'll settle for this, I guess. State-dependent memory dictates that I can only function while drunk, so at least taking a few sips of this will help the lightbulb come back on... - Matty Malaprop
Electricity may seem like a screwy concept to the scientifically disinclined, but hey, at least it powers your apartment! - Matty Malaprop
Where's Your Child?
This Photo Booth Proposal is the Cutest, Simplest Thing
The Avengers Aren't Actually Good Guys
Because it Would be so Hard for You to Look After Your Own ...
The Truest Three Letter Expression About Gift Giving
The Women of FAIL in 2014
Make Way, 'MERICA Has Some Opinions to Share
A Pro Tip for the Santa-Conscious Parents Out There
This Cat Has Enough Patience To Wait Out This Excited Dog
Pick Your Site Name
Tell me more