Rather than pull out some lame mustache pun, I mustache you a questi... dammit...

The King of Beers has been spilt all over the floor.

Is quite epic.

But I mustache... er must ask what is that guy doing back there?

Happy holidays, I won't try to hurt, but it may happen. -Awkward Mustache Guy

The Hungry Whale, patronized by young women, and older women with mustaches that make Burt Reynold envious.

Oh nothing? Well I'm just poking in.

With Warm Regards, -Silver Fox