Maybe it's time to think of different plots.

Army crawls and crouched-down crab walks, this kid thinks he's sneaky, but really he just look hilarious.

As a kid, I was pretty obsessed with turtles. I begged my parents to let me have one as a pet, dragging them to where the hard-shelled creatures sat in the pet store. It was no use - my mother refused. “They smell terrible ,” she said, “and I know you're not going to be cleaning that tank.” I wailed. “Plus, they live forever. We don't want to get stuck with it when you go to college or if you change your mind.” The words stung, but later, I'd know that she was right. Instead of housing a turtle…

Getting in trouble is usually a normal part of growing up. Sometimes kids get in trouble for mouthing off in school. Calling a teacher fat, pulling a prank in class, or simply distracting everyone else until whoever's in charge absolutely loses it. Sometimes, kids get in trouble for their actions at home. This is more common with strict families , like my own. When I was in high school my mother wouldn't allow me a key, or to see friends after school. It led to me sneaking out at night, and whe…

Deeply strange.

Sprinkled with scrumptious satire

Who knew?

Everyone has to grow up. It's one of the few experiences we all share, no matter where we're from or how our backgrounds might differ. It's no wonder some of the most beloved films of all time are coming-of-age stories that deeply resonate with youth and wistful adults alike. The 400 Blows came out in 1959, and yet it's still a timeless window into childhood that's no less relevant today. Ferris Bueller's Day Off is about as aesthetically 80s as it gets, but the desire to ditch school for a day…

You can almost taste the relief.

We're not crying. You're crying.

Let’s just hope it doesn’t end the same way as Shakespeare.

Presumably, every single writer in Hollywood was at some point in time a teenager . At the very least, they probably inject themselves with teenage blood in order to keep their organs strong and their skin moist. So how in the world do they know nothing about them? Thankfully, "Doctor" Jordan Breeding is oft accused of having a teenage sense of humor, so join him as he tears apart teenage movie tropes that have no grounding in reality.