Her boyfriend's name is Douglas Fir, but what she doesn't know is he's been pollenating with other lady-trees and is now a carrier of Phytophthora root rot. - Matty Malaprop
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If a pun falls in the forest and no one's around to hear it, does it still make people groan? - Matty Malaprop
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These people really oughta stop with this conversation before they all make ashes out of themselves. - Matty Malaprop
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