Maybe you wouldn't have this problem with your face if you weren't so overindulgent with your pork spending, Jon! - Matty Malaprop

Check out what's fab funny in showbiz, over at ROFLrazzi!

Sorry, he wasn't paying attention. He was too busy thinking about the last time he was in the garden of good and evil at midnight. - Matty Malaprop

Whether an old man or a young one, there's no question that he's always been gary, gary attractive. - Matty Malaprop

Hmmm... maybe her X took the kid for the weekend? - Matty Malaprop

Check out what's fab funny in showbiz, over at ROFLrazzi!

Only God can Judge us now.- Matty Malaprop

I'm not a huge fan, but that's probably because I can't get accustomed to the taste that comes from coffee brewed in Pepper Potts. - Matty Malaprop

Looks like somebody's gonna be Barackin' and rollin' all night... - Matty Malaprop

Want more political funny? It's cooking over at Pundit Kitchen!