Tree's a Crowd

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Her boyfriend's name is Douglas Fir, but what she doesn't know is he's been pollenating with other lady-trees and is now a carrier of Phytophthora root rot. - Matty Malaprop

Maybe He Should Have Just Kept Silent

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And this, children, is what happens when you open your big mouthpieces. - Matty Malaprop

This is So Typical of the Facebook Hive Mind

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You post one little innocuous picture, and then BOOM! Here comes the swarm! - Matty Malaprop

See more Facebook funny over here!

Wait, How Did We Get Talking About Colors?

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... and also wouldn't it be "ARRRRange?" Ugh, some punsters' children... - Matty Malaprop

Help Me Obi-Pun Kenobi...

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This overly long Facebook abomination is your fault, Darth Waiter... - Matty Malaprop