Someday You'll Find it, That Rainbow Connection

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kermit,commit,request,T.Shirt,similar sounding,advice,dont
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I know life feels so hard right now, but I promise it'll get better! You'll persevere and then everyone will know will be green with envy over your accomplishments! - Matty Malaprop

I'd Really Rather Not...

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homophones,jokes,let us,lettuce,literalism,request,vegetable,yet
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Come on now; everyone knows the only funny vegetable is the potato. - Matty Malaprop

Okay, I Admit It, I Don't Understand.

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begging,bright eyes,confused,emo,emoticons,explanation,geek,Hall of Fame,idgi,math,mathematics,pr0n,pre-calculus,regret,request
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Someone please explain it to me? HOW IS THIS A PUN? WHAT DOES IT MEAN? OH GOD HOW I REGRET SPENDING ALL OF MY TIME IN PRE-CALC LISTENING TO BRIGHT EYES AND TURNING PERFECT CIRCLES INTO CRYING EMO FACES IN MY TEXT BOOK. - Matty Malaprop

What Happens When You Ask for One Ice Cube

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ice cube,request,literalism,one,shape
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To be fair, that's a very large ice cube, so at least you'll get some good mileage out of it! - Matty Malaprop