Come on now; everyone knows the only funny vegetable is the potato. - Matty Malaprop

Please, someone, Rule 34 this. Don't post it on this site. Don't e-mail it to me. Just do it please, so that I'll know in the back of my mind that it's been done. - Matty Malaprop

I hate to break it to you, Mr. Doodle-Guy, but you probably brought those bedroom eyes upon yourself. There are steps you can take to prevent such things, you know... - Matty Malaprop

F*ing vowels, HOW DO THEY WORK? - Matty Malaprop

Someone please explain it to me? HOW IS THIS A PUN? WHAT DOES IT MEAN? OH GOD HOW I REGRET SPENDING ALL OF MY TIME IN PRE-CALC LISTENING TO BRIGHT EYES AND TURNING PERFECT CIRCLES INTO CRYING EMO FACES IN MY TEXT BOOK. - Matty Malaprop

They are already stuffed.