I Have Money And I'm Going To Die Soon

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I Have Money And I'm Going To Die Soon
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Say what you will, but I still maintain the best ever pickup line is "Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?" - Matty Malaprop

GPOY My love Life

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GPOY My love Life
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Remarkable, sure, but it's also a congenital defect that causes her great amounts of pain every day. :( - Matty Malaprop

It Might Be More Effective WITHOUT the Trucknuts...

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It Might Be More Effective WITHOUT the Trucknuts...
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Hey girl, do you want to save the environment? Because my reproductive rig runs on biodiesel! - Matty Malaprop

Let's Hope She Doesn't Respond Negatively to That Line

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Let's Hope She Doesn't Respond Negatively to That Line
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Sadly, after one steamy night these two never spoke again. Ms. Film thought Mr. Film was a nice guy, but ultimately decided he was totally disposable. - Matty Malaprop