I... don't own gloves because I HAVE INCREDIBLY POOR CIRCULATION IN MY EXTREMITIES SO THEY DON'T DO ANYTHING ANYWAY. :( - Matty Malaprop

One of them murders innocent children and keeps your hands cozy and warm. The other is actually called a birdie and is loved by many many high school athletes in Hong Kong. The line's a little blurry, really. - Matty Malaprop