It's Only Because He Admires Your Curves

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average,data,double meaning,Hall of Fame,literalism,math,mean,weighted
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Sometimes you just need someone to walk with on the mean streets... because you're dead in the middle of oncoming traffic and whatnot, and it's nice to have a human shield standing by. - Matty Malaprop

Every Mathematician's Bling Dream

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accessory,Bling,fashion,fibonacci,literalism,math,mathematics,sequence,Sequins,similar sounding
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For added fun, try blinging out your girlfriend's sunflower broach with these suckers! Recursive accessorizing FTW! - Matty Malaprop

For Anyone Who Thinks Math Jokes Arboring

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Square,literalism,root,tree,math,square root
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I bet that square is nine, because its root looks like tree to me! - Matty Malaprop