Seriously, just don't. I can assure you that you definitely DO NOT want to double the Fines of Moria.

GONNA TAKE A LOT TO KEEP ME AWAY FROM YOU / THERE'S NOTHING THAT A HUNDRED ORCS OR MORE COULD EVER DO / I BLESS THE RAINS DOWN IN MIDDLE-EARTH / GONNA TAKE SOME TIME TO FIND THE RINGS WE NEVER HAVE" - Matty Malaprop

Go on shawty, it's your one hundred and eleventieth birthday; we gon' party like it's your one hundred and eleventieth birthday. - Matty Malaprop

We have agreed: You are a hipster. - Matty Malaprop

Because one does not simply rocket-jump into Mordor. - Matty Malaprop

I mean seriously people, this isn't the damn Labyrinth we're talking about! And if David Bowie isn't waiting for me pelvis-out in a beautiful codpiece when I go through a door, well then I don't want to go through that door at all! - Matty Malaprop

Faramir told me he "died well, achieving some good readings. His face was more pressurized even than in life." - Matty Malaprop