This drink brought to you by Bruno Mars, since we all know he'd catch a grenade for you. - Matty Malaprop

Do you think if I shatter a Maroon 5 CD like a Jäger bottle, I'll wake up hungover and realize the existence of that song was just a bad, drunk dream? Fingers and liver crossed... - Matty Malaprop

Coincidentally, that's the phrase my entire life mutters every time I take a shot of that wretched concoction. - Matty Malaprop

It's a party over here! A party over there!