Not As Exciting as a Safari, But Oh Well...

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Not As Exciting as a Safari, But Oh Well...
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And I'd prefer he be a Firefox, but sigh, you can't always get what you want. - Matty Malaprop

I'm More Partial to Mimicking Magpies

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I'm More Partial to Mimicking Magpies
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... but sadly in good ol' Montucky it's illegal to keep magpies as pets. And no, I'm not making that up. - Matty Malaprop

Hate to Break it to You, But Your Mama's Dead

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Hate to Break it to You, But Your Mama's Dead
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Also, you may be the cutest spider in existence, but I'm still going to stomp the sh*t out of you if I ever see you on the street.

Love, Matty Malaprop

But She Still Uses Dial-Up, So She Can't Receive Kahlos

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But She Still Uses Dial-Up, So She Can't Receive Kahlos
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Mindless web browsing is a pretty fine way to spend a Frida night, if you ask me. - Matty Malaprop

IE is on Safari

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IE is on Safari
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Do you think he might be on the prowl for the elusive Firefox? I bet he wants to mount its taxidermied head to the wall of his Opera. - Matty Malaprop