As my Colorado friends often remind me, this kind of thing is what they call "just another day in Boulder." - Matty Malaprop

Sure, he uses a cane, but that doesn't mean he can't dance Hugh under the table! - Matty Malaprop

And it was precisely then that poor little Susie developed her longstanding case of Iatrophobia. - Matty Malaprop

Thanks punmaster Magician_at_large for finding the source for this comic!

My entreaty is true either way, though I suppose the context is radically altered in each instance... - Matty Malaprop

Oh, I'm sorry, you were expecting me to foot your bill? How droll! - Matty Malaprop

(W)Hose to say why this house is so happy? I'm certainly blinds as to the reason. - Matty Malaprop

Nothing to sort here, hat. Move along. - Matty Malaprop