homophone

clog,clogged,clogs,double meaning,homophone,literalism,sink,think
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Browsing Wikipedia for ~~inspiration~~ for my writeup for this post, I learned that there are many different types of clogs. Traditional clogs, clog sandals, clog boots (!), wedding clogs (!!), low heel clogs, and a giant four-meter long clog in Enter, Netherlands. This information didn't help me write a joke though... all it did was clog my brain with even more useless information.

... I'm going to go cry myself to sleep for having just cracked that one. I'm so sorry, everyone. - Matty Malaprop

captain,double meaning,homophone,jack sparrow,Johnny Depp,literalism,Pirates of the Caribbean,song,tail,tale
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Johnny, Honey, you really oughta get that vestigial monstrosity taken care of! Maybe Sweeney Todd could help you snip it off? - Matty Malaprop

beegees,Hall of Fame,homophone,lyrics,similar sounding,song,staying alive,walk,wok
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There's a part of me that really wants to be offended by this post. But COME ON. Stayin' Arive? That's GOLD, right there. - Matty Malaprop

cellar,double meaning,ebay,feedback,homophone,literalism,seller
Via: Octopuns
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I'm sure he's cellarbrating his latest sale right this instant! - Matty Malaprop

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