Man, what is it with all these TAs with strange names? Helen Waite for my English class, and Fa Kyerself for my philosophy class... - Matty Malaprop

Oh, science jokes... my best friend's engaged to a Biochemistry Ph.D., but I swear to god if I hear the "unzip your genes" joke one more time, I'm going to wreck that highfalutin home. - Matty Malaprop

Meanwhile, residents in nearby Heck are enjoying comfortable temperatures in the mid-60s. - Matty Malaprop

I'm pretty sure these fishers will be singing a different tuna when their aquatic prey start coming after them armed with swordfish... - Matty Malaprop