Your Wish is My Command

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Your Wish is My Command
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I mostly just want to avoid getting ticketed and/or towed... but your kind words really did make my day, ma'am! - Matty Malaprop

It's Really Messing Up Our MuLAN Party

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It's Really Messing Up Our MuLAN Party
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How are we ever going to beat the Huns if our connections keep timing out!? - Matty Malaprop

Water Conducts Electricity

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Water Conducts Electricity
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I feel like Philip Glass is one of the only neo-classical composers who gets any sort of consistent acclaim... but that's just bullocks in my mind; he's only even a semi-conductor! - Matty Malaprop

What Kind of Roll Even is That?

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What Kind of Roll Even is That?
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I mean, I know I'm nitpicking here, but seriously. THIS PUN WOULD BE SO MUCH FUNNIER FOR ME IF ONLY I KNEW WHAT KIND OF ROLL YOU WERE LITERALLY ON LADY! - Matty Malaprop

Courtship Circa 2012

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Courtship Circa 2012
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Please don't let this become a commonly used macro please don't let this become a commonly used macro please don't let this become a commonly used macro please don't let this become a commonly used macro please don't let this become a commonly used macro... - Matty Malaprop

It's-a-Me! A Club Card Holder!

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It's-a-Me! A Club Card Holder!
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Dude's gotta get his fire flower potting soil somewhere, amirite? - Matty Malaprop

Tap Dancers

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Tap Dancers
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Their motions on the floor are always very fluid, and concerning their choreography, no one could ever rightly say they faucet. - Matty Malaprop