Please, Bring Our Sailors Home

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description,double meaning,house,light,lighthouse,literalism,weight
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My entreaty is true either way, though I suppose the context is radically altered in each instance... - Matty Malaprop

Once Again, Gemma Correll Delivers

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censored,streaky,literalism,description,bacon
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Because bacon and nekkid shenanigans should ALWAYS go hand-in-hand! - Matty Malaprop

Books Let the Imagination Run Free... And Sometimes That's a Weird Thing.

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face,misinterpretation,literalism,hit,perfectly,sun,morbid,description
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This was apparently drawn by a 10-year-old, and that's awesome. Except said 10-year-old is way better at art than me, and that's really sad. :( - Matty Malaprop

Reason Number 1,307,248 Not to Trust Craigslist

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Ad,blonde,blue eyes,body,creepy,description,double meaning,face,female,Hall of Fame,internet,literalism,lolwut,model,personal
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The part of her ad this comic doesn't show is the creepiest part of all: "I've got the love of a thousand hearts to give you, and I can offer you ass for days..." - Matty Malaprop

Download the new Cheezburger app for a chance to win a PS4! in Cheezburger 's Hangs on LockerDome