bruce willis

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Unfortunately, it's not a sense one can very well possess when struggling against the perils of frostbite. - Matty Malaprop

Via: The Outside Joke
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Toucan play at the time-traveling assassin game. And touwill. - Matty Malaprop

Set humor to ludicrous speed!

Star of Fly Hard, and 16 Flocks
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SPOILER ALERT: HE'S BEEN A GOOSE THE WHOLE TIME!!!11!!!!!1!!! - Matty Malaprop

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Perhaps you should see him to the afterlife with some very rigorous mortis? - Matty Malaprop

By Unknown
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And he just started seeing a new lover, too! So I guess you could even say he... died hard with a vengeance. - Matty Malaprop