batman

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"You merely adopted obesity! I was born in it, molded by it. I did not see a treadmill until I was already a man!" - Matty Malaprop

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He rises, he descends, but he sure as hell never stays in one place for longer than a hot minute. - Matty Malaprop

It's simple. We photograph the Batman.

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Well you can't argue with the fact that this is perfectly in keeping with Bruce Wayne's typical crime-fighting M.O.: When in doubt, hit the sumb*tch. - Matty Malaprop

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He also took the liberty of polishing Bruce's shoes while he was out. Miss Fancy Pants is a far funner loafer color than black, after all! - Matty Malaprop