She May Be Hot, But Her Personality is Rather Chile

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sex,cliché,miner,minor,literalism,homophone,bad joke is bad,double meaning
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There's gold in them there frills! - Matty Malaprop

Only if They Manetain an Equal Distance Throughout

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bad joke is bad,equidistant,equine,literalism,prefix,similar sounding,twitter
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I think the answer to this question is actually quite simple. It would behoove you to not overthink it. - Matty Malaprop

Turtle Recall

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bad joke is bad,literalism,recall,similar sounding,total,total recall,turtle
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... am I the only imagining Schwarzenegger kitten after seeing this? - Matty Malaprop

See the original version of this pun here! Thanks to violetD for the inspiration!