Bet You Didn't Realize Superman Was Black!

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Bet You Didn't Realize Superman Was Black!
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FUN FACT: This was actually written to be canon in the long-lost eighth Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Ever-Chafing Spandex Super Suit. - Matty Malaprop

'I Lobster But Never Flounder.'

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... I'm just gonna leave this here and go have a massive EMBARRASS over in the corner, thanks. - Matty Malaprop

Hold the Scotch, She's Watching Her Weight

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Hold the Scotch, She's Watching Her Weight
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And besides, it's never a bad idea to moderate your drinking when you're a diabetic. - Matty Malaprop

Oh Pancake, You So Pencil-y!

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Oh Pancake, You So Pencil-y!
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Seems to me like this friendship ended up pretty broken after Pepper snapped and started a graphite. - Matty Malaprop

One Foot of Snow is Better Than Two, Right?

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One Foot of Snow is Better Than Two, Right?
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Plus, that nail polish job is just ~~FAAAAABULOUS~~ - Matty Malaprop

Evaporated Milk

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Evaporated Milk
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I've had evaporated milk exactly once. It wasn't dairy good. - Matty Malaprop