BREAKING NEWS, GUYS!

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We know this is big news, and you probably didn't see it coming at all, but just take a moment to try and let it sink in.

Anderson Cooper Doesn't Know Segment is About Him

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Anderson Cooper, silver fox, CNN anchor and king of on-air giggle fits, was surprised by his staff this week, when he realized the "Ridiculist" segment was about himself.

He began the piece thinking that he was about to discuss workplace annoyances, but the camera then revealed his own desk with a lit, basil-scented candle that apparently everyone else on his staff hates.

"Somebody told me I smelled," he said in response. "So that's why I got the candle."

The Worst Way to Start a Flight

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"It's all downhill from here... wait, no! Forget I said that!"