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Miami Dolphins FB Rob Konrad Recently Spent 16 Hours Stranded at Sea Swimming in Shark-Infested Waters

On January 7, former Miami Dolphins FB Rob Konrad fell off of his fishing boat into the Atlantic Ocean and had to swim 9 miles through shark-infested waters to safety. Recently, he spoke to the media about the entire ordeal. Here's his story as retweeted by NFL reporter Jeff Darlington.

[h/t UPROXX]

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That's sarcasm, in case you didn't figure it out. Our piss-poor education system is an issue of national concern, and, more importantly, national shame.